I’m sorry Sabrina isn’t here right now, would you like to leave a message?
I’m just frustrated this week. To be completely honest, I’ve been on an anti depressant for the past 6 months because I get really bad mood swings but, I was reading up on the one I was taking and decided that I didn’t want to be taking it anymore.
I don’t want to have a drug control my mood… unluckily, the first 2-14 days off this drug are known to cause some serious withdrawal effects which, paired with some of the things I have been stressing about lately, is just not cool…
I’ve come to realize as of late that, I am a broke, lazy-ass. I’m the person that I talk shit about. There are so many things that I want to do in life and, I’ve barely done any of them.
Did anybody know that I love to act? That I love to sing?How about that, I’m actually GOOD at those two things?
The answer to the above is predominantly NO. You know why?
Because I don’t believe in myself. I don’t think I’ll succeed, so, instead of giving it a shot, I do nothing…
How absolutely and completely pathetic is that?
I use a program called Things(it’s an alternative to a day planner) and one of the things I’ve had on it for almost a month now is – Create an Etsy store and sell prints… I haven’t done that, because I don’t think anyone would actually buy them. I never try anything and that is why I hate myself.
I’m to scared to put myself out there and I’ll never get anywhere if I don’t. I’m wasting away, wasting my youth in a fucking room all by myself because I won’t walk out the damn door and make something out of myself.
I guess you could say that it’s good that I’ve taken the first step and gotten out of denial, the thing is, now I actually have to do something, which scares me ten times more than anything else ever has.
there is nothing wrong with taking anti depressants. If you need them, take them.
you are a gifted artist. Your photos are amazing.
You live in an area that has hundreds of musicians, many of them looking for a vocalist. Get out there and audition! OR if that does not appeal to you, get a band together!
I know, none of this is easy, but hell woman, you have the courage to pose nude for photographers! You can DO anything!
Art is easy. Showing it to other people is hard.
love ya,
skrapsmijusa
Sabrina,
I’ve just got to your Blog via your Flickr page, so hello!
You should know that you can do anything you put your mind to. You are only limited by your own fears. One of my favourite quotes fits well here i think:
“In the time of your life, live – so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it.” William Saroyan
Leave the pills. Love yourself. Live.
Andy
Sabi – You are strong, and you are doing GREAT! As long as you know what you want, keep working at it, and it will come! Oh, and I’m still trying to get that package out!
I really enjoy your work.
I wish I could subscribe to your Blog, I don’t want to miss anything that you might put up here.
Just wanted to let you know that I feel this is really great, love your work, and am really happy at your being YOU.
Thank YOU,
-Mike
I think I have an RSS feed… I have no clue how any of it works though lol.
Thank you
keep writing it helps, trust me it is a great outlet and others can feel your pain, so share the wealth!
p.s. i love the pix on your stream, maybe i’ll send some dots that you could frame.
Thanks, i’m trying to keep writing. it’s hard sometimes though because, that’s when i tend to look at myself.